Barack OBloga’s “March Madness” Funniest Player Names Ranked

Above is the my Rankings for the Funniest Names of March Madness Players. Here is the list:

10.Coreontae Deberry-I assumed this name was from a Key & Peele “East vs.West Bowl Game” until I saw him play the other night for Cincinnati. Above is the a picture of “The DeBerry” getting smushed. Everyone knows smushed berries don’t taste good and thus consequently, Cincinnati lost in the first round.

9. Daniel Dingle-This Temple basketball player has a very effective offensive strategy. He attempts to look like horror film ghost “Scream”. His ringtone on his phone is “Hot Line Bling” by Drake.

8.Bonzie Colson-This Notre Dame basketball player loves to go to the pool on his off days. Thus, as shown above, Bonzie likes to flail his arms like a pool noodle whenever he misses a shot to think of happy thoughts and keep a positive attitude.

7.OG Anunoby- This Indiana basketball player displays above with precision and perfection, the OG or Original “Low Five”.  Many basketball players use the hand clap gesture commonly known as the “High Five”, but as we all know, OG Anunoby created the “Low Five” and thus plays ball with style.

6.Tres Tinkle- This Oklahoma basketball player is known for his great defensive technique of always having his head on a swivel. Always keeping an eye on the defender and an eye on the bathroom of course.

5.Papa Ndao- This Saint Joseph’s basketball player is known by everyone as the father of basketball. In the Atlantic 10 Championship a couple weeks ago against VCU, Papa Ndao was thrown out for saying something to the referee that wasn’t shared with the public. I am fairly sure that Ndao was thrown out of the game because the referee didn’t believe that Ndao was his father. Thus, with the anxiety of finding his true father, the referee was forced to dismiss his dad from the game as he was so overwhelmed he couldn’t focus on the game. Ndao responded by saying, “See you later son.”

4.Diamond Stone- This Maryland basketball player is rock solid. As shown above, he uses the skill of sticking his tongue out to distract the other team and lead Maryland to victory.

3.Giddy Potts-This Middle Tennessee basketball player has an unorthodox way of playing defense as shown above. He tries to look like an injured crashing bird in flight to distract his opponent. When it works, which is every time, he then soars high to the basket for a dunk after his tremendous steal from wherever he is on the court.

2.Mo Alie-Cox-This Virginia Commonwealth basketball player is my favorite on the list. Have you ever seen him play? If you haven’t, imagine an ox playing basketball. The bad news for Mo is that I heard from a credible source that he is being persecuted for stealing the dignity from George Washington’s big man Tyler Cavanaugh, when he posturized him in one of VCU’s games. You can see the dunk here.

1.Scoochie Smith -This Dayton basketball player is our March Madness Funny Name Champion. Above, Scoochie is shown in his natural habit eying his target, getting ready to “Schoochie” his way over to the cute cheerleader on the sidelines and then proceed to get her number.

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Barack-Etology: March Madness 2016-Kansas Jayhawks

 

President Barack Obama has picked Kansas to win the NCAA title, with the hopes of correctly selecting college basketball’s national champion in the first and last years of his presidency.

Obama will leave office in January 2017. He correctly picked North Carolina in his first year in office in 2009, but he hasn’t selected the winner in the past six brackets.

Obama also picked the Jayhawks to knock off Texas A&M and the Tar Heels to beat Michigan State in the Final Four before meeting in the final on April 4th in Houston.

This is the third time he has picked Kansas to win the title; he also selected the Jayhawks in 2010 and 2011.

Barack’s “big upset” is his prediction of his home state Hawaii, to beat the higher seeded California.

Barack Obama discusses that a lot of his choices for his predictions are based upon choosing teams with great coaches as he believes they can coach any players to victory. Thus, Obama has a lot of faith in Coach K of Duke, Coach Izzo of Michigan State, Coach Calipari of UConn, and of coarse, Coach Self of his predicted champion, Kansas.

Obama believes that Kansas will win due to the talents of Coach Self, and star players Perry Ellis and Wayne Selden as well. He believes that Buddy Hield of Oklahoma will be the next great NBA player and believes that Denzel Valentine of Michigan State is the best player in the tournament.

You can find Barack Obama’s March Madness interview here.

March Madness: CBS NCAA Basketball 2016 Rankings

Here’s how they rank, The Top Ten College Basketball Teams of 2016, by CBS Sports:

1. Michigan State: Tom Izzo has the most valuable player in the game in Denzel Valentine. Bryn Forbes is as dangerous a 3-point shooter as there is in college hoops. MSU not getting a No. 1 seed was ridiculous.

2. Kansas: Have been locked into the No. 1 overall seed for weeks now. The irony is, from a talent standpoint, this isn’t one of Bill Self’s all-time teams. Look for Wayne Selden to try and have a huge tournament, especially after his dunk turned his uncle into the Internet’s most popular fan over the weekend.

3. North Carolina: Everybody’s going to be hot on UNC because the Heels won the ACC’s regular season and the tournament titles. It was the preseason No. 1 team in the eyes of many. Without question, this is looking like one of the four best teams in the nation.

4. Virginia: Malcolm Brogdon is finishing up one of the greatest ACC careers in conference history. Tony Bennett has been picked off early despite really good seeds in recent years. But here’s the difference this time around: Virginia has a much better offense than the past two seasons.

5. Oklahoma: Buddy Hield was the most watchable player in college basketball this season. But OU has much more than Buddy. Isaiah Cousins and Jordan Woodard help comprise the best three-person backcourt in America. Plus, OU still plays good defense. Obviously, the 3-pointer should be a huge factor in how far this team goes.

6. Oregon: Most of the country hasn’t seen more than a game or two from Oregon, but this group has been lighting it up for most of the past two months. Tyler Dorsey is a name to know. Outstanding freshman. Chris Boucher is one of the elite defenders in the game, too. Oh, right, and Dillon Brooks might’ve had the best overall season in the Pac-12.

7. Villanova: Villanova will be doubted again. Just know it has one of the toughest starting fives in the nation, and Josh Hart was one of the 15 best players in America this season. Nova is quite good, people.

8. Maryland: No starting five in this tournament has a higher ceiling than Maryland, but it gets bumped down from the top five because of its inconsistency throughout the season. You couldn’t be faulted for putting this group into the Final Four, though.

9. Kentucky: The Wildcats are always dangerous in this tournament so long as John Calipari is on the sidelines. Jamal Murray is a 3-point-shooting beauty and Tyler Ulis is the best point guard in America.

10. Xavier: Chris Mack was the National Coach of the Year in the eyes of many. There isn’t a team deeper and more spread across the board than Xavier. Don’t doubt them because they haven’t been seeded this high before. This group is good. Trevon Bluiett and Edmond Sumner can be stars.

*If you would like to see all 68 NCAA College Basketball teams ranked by CBS click here